There’s plenty of ranting going on in the Twilight Lounge this week, thanks to the kid playing video games in the library. Thus triggered, Rosen descends into a somewhat thoughtful monologue that ends with the boys imagining their own (non-existent) Wikipedia pages and waxing nostalgic about their childhood audio experiences.
Also mentioned this celebrity-laden week: Israeli boxers, Roman Polanski, Quentin Tarantino, Tel Aviv, Mike Tyson, Terri Nunn and Marv Gomez, the Leatherman, Bruno Mars and the farcical adventures of Bernie Sanders.
On to this week’s question:
Is Jeff Goldblum good for the Jews?
I’ll tell you this much: he’s better for the Jews than Bernie is.
This week, Goldbrener declares his love for floral and paisley shirts and tells a horrifying tale of a friend who once had the hiccups for “years.” Somehow that leads to anxiety over the economics of adventure guides and eventually, a general suspicion about the purpose of a digital map of “Jewish San Francisco” and a surprise — a Jewish sports connection Goldbrener actually finds interesting!
Meanwhile, in the world of actual news, Bernie is up to his “I’m not that kind of Jew” tricks again, and an out-of-the-box idea has the boys wondering….
Is a “free tuition for U.S. Jews” program at Israeli universities good for the Jews?
The idea here is that Birthright is the tip of the iceberg; what if 1,000 Jewish-American post-adolescents had a four-year journey into Israel, free of the woke anti-Jewish harassment endemic to U.S. college campuses? Would it work? Would the anti-Zionist coalition collectively roll its eyes while insisting that some of its best friends are Jews? Should Israel care?
Things get fiery in the Twilight Lounge this week when Rosen lobs what he thinks is a softball at Goldbrener only to receive in response the debate equivalent of a blistering line drive through the box. Chastened and caught unprepared by Godbrener’s increasingly nuanced view of the Middle East, Rosen retreats into more comfortable terrain, asking:
are bagels good for the Jews?
It seems like a slam dunk, but should an item brimming with carbohydrates and not much else really be the trademark food of a people? Also discussed: the shelf life of being hip and current, the proper jeans for middle age, the origins and character of “Jewish food” and kosher Thin Mints.